Monday, March 1, 2010

My NYC date with Robert Pattinson

Hey Rob-

Did you see me in the crowd at the Today Show this morning?

Is that you, Bitch?

No? Geez, that's surprising.


Because I didn't go NYC like I planned.

I know Rob, you're devastated. Wait, or am I devastated? I'm so devastated I'm not truly sure.

I've been reading the Tweets of other lucky bitches who were smart enough to be in NYC today. And all I can wish is that I had been that smart. They got to see you, talk to you, SMELL you! Apparently you smell like fairies and unicorns. And I wouldn't know, because I am stupid.

You see, I was hoping that some "connections" were going to actually get me into the premiere and some of your other appearances. That I, Princess Bitch, wouldn't have to stand outside on lines in the cold like some commoner, hoping to get a moment's glance of you from 50 ft. - a crumb of acknowledgement tossed my way. No. I wanted it all, and now I have nothing. NOTHING!!!!

Serves me fucking right for being such a lazy, entitled bitch. I'm too old to deal with the cold and standing and walking - in addition to being a primadonna. Crushing on a man half my age must be what it feels like to have children in your 60's. Not a good idea.

Sigh, if only Remember Me had been released in April or May - you know, warmer months. I would have SO been there Rob.


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